Chasing the success of others lead me down a dark, depressing road…
About a year ago I found myself in one of the lowest emotional states of my life. I had spent the better part of the previous three years closely monitoring (and drooling over) the launches and successes of others in various Facebook groups, and as a result, had pushed myself to work-work-work to achieve the same results. I figured if these people could make millions of dollars selling programs and services in these market segments, then so could I!
I set to work developing courses I wasn’t passionate about, and as a result, did no market research, had no launch strategy, and in the end through a handful of products to people who 1) didn’t know me and 2) didn’t need or want what I was offering.
The results were pitiful.
After countless sleepless nights, I wound up with 0 sales and a truckload of frustration and anxiety. I felt like a failure.
Then a friend told me the words that shifted my life and business…
“You’re Kim, not (insert name here).”
You know the moments in cartoons where the bells chime, the clouds part, and the sunlight pours through?
Yea, this was one of those moments.
I could hear Johnny Nash singing “I Can See Clearly Now” and I knew what I had to do…
Chasing the success of others had turned me into somebody I wasn’t and somebody I didn’t want to be.
- Chasing income and not impact.
- Saying “Yes” to opportunities which were clearly a “No”.
- Losing sleep over projects I wasn’t passionate about.
- Building crap products because my heart wasn’t truly in them.
- Dropping the ball on client work because I was trying to do too much
I was… Losing ME.
Stepping back and looking at the success of others, I realized success was actually “success.” Nobody truly knows what success looks like for these people on the other side of the camera or screenshots.
- How much makeup did they have to wear to cover up the exhaustion from sleepless nights?
- How much debt did they incur to make $X from that product launch? (And did it cover the debt?)
- How healthy is their family/social life?
- And… Does that “success” make them happy?
Chasing the success of others had turned me into a miserable shell of a human being. My dreams had disappeared and my creativity, spark and spunk right with it.
Was it worth it? Did I want to achieve their supposed income level just to lose any true connection with myself?
I wanted to be free! Free to follow my dreams. Free to sleep at night. Free to help people in ways which were conducive with my heart. And free to say “NO!” to opportunities which were not the right fit.
So what did I do?
I stopped offering services I didn’t love.
I stopped selling courses I really didn’t care about but created only because I thought I “had to.”
I threw out one of my podcasts (as in, the ENTIRE show) despite it already having 10+ episodes recorded.
I ended contracts with clients I didn’t enjoy working with.
And I stopped saying “YES!” when I should have been saying “NO!”
I CAN be successful by being myself. I CAN be successful as a mom of five crazy kids. I CAN be successful even when I turn down work I’m not passionate about.
And so can you.
Stop chasing the success of others. Create your own vision of success and follow that instead.
P.S. When I stopped chasing the success of others I didn’t hurt my income… I multiplied it. After living for 5+ years in constant debt and state disconnect, my change in focus turned my income around in such a way that our $0 finally started to raise. Success doesn’t mean rich to me, and I’m never going flaunt figures at you. But finally we achieved the mental space of financial security we had been looking for, and you can do this too.
Are you ready to create your own vision of success but don’t know where to start? Sign up for a complimentary 30-minute Positive Productivity Coaching Call at http://meetme.so/PositiveProductivity.
Kim Sutton is a Digital Marketing and Launch Strategist and owner of The Sutton Companies, which includes Sutton Strategic Solutions and Kim Sutton. A graduate of The School of the Art Institute of Chicago, she is passionate about helping business coaches, life coaches and speakers spread their messages and products to those who need them.
An avid reader and passionate learner, Kim is constantly researching, studying and developing business improvement strategies. You are invited to schedule a complimentary 30-minute Strategy Session by clicking here.
In her free-time, Kim cherishes the time she spends with her husband, Dave, and five children. She also enjoys reading, knitting, writing and playing video games.
Join Kim’s Private Facebook Group, The Positive Productivity Mastermind here.